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Wednesday, 17 January, 2018
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Waaaaaaa, The Poor Little Rich Wench

Date: 15 June, 2007

By: Chief

Imagehat's Paris Hilton for you. Though in all fairness and in true blunt objectivity I suppose I could have titled this story — 'Paris Hilton, all blond and no brain'. However, I prefer the existing title, it is so apropos to her and this story.

As the poor little rich Wench got her fame and fortune, with a bigger fortune to come, the old fashioned way (no, not on her knees either) — she was hatched, er, born into it. She, the poor dear, has had to suffer the horrid pains of growing up by getting anything and everything she wanted, but more importantly, getting away with anything and everything. Whether by asking, politely (oh ha) or by pouting and whining (I suspect the latter was the normal behavior for the Wench) is moot. Her actions tell the whole story.

I submit her actions duly recorded by the mainstream media provide a telling and somewhat chilling record of a Wench who, until Judge Sauer threw her worthless butt into the Los Angeles cross bars bed and breakfast for a second time, had never before in her entire useless life been held responsible let alone accountable for her very own actions. She is, to be sure, an utter waste of perfectly good oxygen (which is in scarce supply in L.A.).

And oh yes, the Wench did bring all of these recent legal woes fully upon herself. The Wench was initially stopped because she was driving her Mercedes in an unsafe manner. Hint, she was weaving all over the road. She was given a sobriety test and failed it. Yet for some unknown reason, you figure it out, the Wench was never charged with driving while intoxicated (DWI) or drunk driving, call it what you will. No sir. When she first appeared in court she plead no contest to reckless driving, a lesser charge. The presiding judge sentenced her to:

So, as one can tell, the Wench was already cut some slack. Slack you or I more than likely would not be cut. Equal justice under law is where? Or justice at a price.

Furthermore, it is not at all unusual for a judge to impose additional restrictions upon the person pleading no contest or guilty. Restrictions such as:

Were there additional restrictions placed on the Wench? I don't know. But none have been reported in the papers that I am aware of.

Apparently the Wench cannot read either, which is typical for a blond with no brain. As such she was doomed to violate the terms and conditions of her probation from the get-go. Ah, the poor little rich Wench. Don't you just feel sooooo sorry for her? Puh-lease.

She was subsequently busted twice for a probation violation. To wit: driving on a suspended license. However, there is no publicly available record that I have been able to find of what transpired after the first violation. Therefore she may or may not have been cut additional slack.

But after the second bust for violating her probation the Wench was ordered to appear in court before Judge Sauer.

At that hearing her lawyers, yes there were more than one, argued that it was not the Wench's fault. It was, and this part is really rich (yes, pun intended), the fault of her staff. Quoting Debra J Saunders:

"She [Paris] said that her aides never told her she could not drive, and she never read the form an officer made her sign stipulating that she could not drive."

Oh my God. I have extreme difficulty in believing she actually had the gall to say that before the court. To put it another way — 'don't shoot me judge, it isn't my fault, my staff didn't tell me I couldn't drive, so shoot them instead'.

Passing the blame onto others versus accepting the responsibility and accountability for her very own actions is what tic'd the judge off. You can, I think, make book on that. But passing the blame — that is what she knows. I mean, in her own mind (an oxymoron without peer) the Wench is better than the rest of us. Nay, she is royalty and fully believes she should be treated as such.

Well old Judge Sauer obviously did not like what he heard and meted out the Wench's punishment — 45 days as a guest in a Los Angeles County cross bars bed and breakfast. Sorry honey, no chocolate on the pillow either.

The sentencing order in the Wench's case clearly states:

"No work furlough. No work release. No electronic monitoring. No weekends. No city jail."

In addition contained in the remarks sections of the order is this little gem:

"If D fails to appear, 90 days!!"

Her sentence was stayed until 05 June, 2007 at which time she had to turn herself in or, if she did fail to appear, her sentence in jail would automatically be doubled to 90 days. The really important part was the sentencing judge specifically ordered no electronic monitoring.

To her credit she did turn herself in on time but within a very few days the elected sheriff of the County of Los Angeles, Sheriff Lee Baca, in willful violation of a court order, released the Wench from jail on an electronic leash and confined her to house arrest.

Now did somebody possibly get to the Sheriff Baca or contribute to his election/reelection campaign? Quoting the Daily Telegraph (UK):

"Paris Hilton's billionaire grandfather donated money to the election campaign of the sheriff who released the 26-year-old from jail, it was revealed yesterday.

"The contribution from William Barron Hilton, 78, co-chairman of the Hilton Hotel chain, to Sheriff Lee Baca's re-election campaign is revealed in financial records and a friend of the Hilton family said the temporary release of the heiress last week may have been a 'quid pro quo'.

" 'A member of her family has been a contributor to Baca's campaign and this may have been payback time', the friend said."

I have no problem with William Hilton making a campaign contribution. He, like the rest of us, has the right to make such contributions. Whether or not the campaign contribution played any part in Sheriff Baca's decision to cut the Wench loose early is irrelevant, it'll never be proven one way or the other anyhow. The singular issue here is Sheriff Baca willfully violated a court order and as such should be recalled from office and subsequently thrown into his formerly own hoosegow.

Nobody with the exception of an appellate (higher) court can reduce or change the sentence of a convicted person. Period.

Now I gotta tell you life is really rough if you are a member of the rich and shameless club.

Apparently some of her aides or "pals" (and I use that word very, very loosely) thought that the poor Wench had been treated so unfairly as to be cruel. Quoting The Sun (UK):

"Jail insiders said Paris had sobbed herself to sleep every night. She was heard repeatedly complaining she was cold and that she was hungry because she couldn’t eat the prison food.

"But once back at her luxury home, Paris celebrated by inviting her family round.

"A pal said she had sent her assistant shopping and arranged for her make-up artist to visit.

"The pal said: 'It's so cruel what has happened to her. She wasn't allowed to wax or use a moisturiser. Her skin is so dry right now'."

'Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. Mom, Mom — I need my face fixed right now'.

So true Wench. So painfully true. You do need your face fixed, but moisturizer won't accomplish what is needed. Your ugliness is far more than skin deep. Indeed the vileness and ugliness goes all the way to the bone.

Sheriff Lee Baca stated potential physiological problems including possible suicide by the Wench, which could not be handled in the county jail, is why he released her. Hogwash says I.

Suicide? If only we could be so lucky that the Wench would indeed off herself. Regrettably, the Wench is so out right stupid that she no doubt would fail in the process of taking he own life. She probably would try to hang herself with a bungee cord.

Thankfully her life of home confinement was short lived. Three days, but it was five days too many in my opinion. She was ordered to appear in court, which she did, and Judge Sauer ordered her remanded, forthwith, to a Los Angeles county cross bars bed and breakfast to serve out the remainder of her sentence.

Will she survive the duration of her sentence? I, for one, don't care. I think we would be far better off without her. Indeed (quoting Ko Ko, the Lord Hight Executioner from Gilbert and Sullivan's "Mikado."):

"[Her] loss will be a distinct gain to society at large."

Will she get out early on "good behavior" or even earlier? I have no clue and neither does anyone else. Will she have learned her lesson? The smarmy look of 'I am truly better than anybody else' (that is the vileness and ugliness I was referring to) look on her face will never die until she does.

And the sooner the better says I.

[Ed. note: This story has been updated.]

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