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Fire

Date: 01 April, 2011

By: Chief

Image've got to tell y'all that out where we live — in the high plains of southeast New Mexico — there isn't anything around. Just grass and some brush. But most importantly — no people. It's really nice and quiet. We love it.

Now with that said the one problem which can and does occur occasionally is a brush fire, prairie fire or wild fire. Call 'em what you will they mean the same thing. I have written about this rather hot topic before and believe me when I say this:

'There is nothing scarier in the world than a brush fire being pushed by wind in dry grass and brush'.

I will also guarantee you will have better luck trying to control an earthquake (just ask the Japanese) than trying to put out a fast moving fire in those conditions.

It is one of the things we take for granted. We know a fire can happen at darn near anytime. This is why our fire break around the house is just about an acre in size for each of the cardinal points.

Face it — mid June is not all that far off and that is when our summer thunder storms normally start. And brother we get some real barn burners. Just add to that our winter and spring so far have resulted in approximately 6 inches of snow — back in January. Suffice to say it is dryer than a popcorn fart here.

Arson

Now we cannot "prevent" a fire from starting, Mother Nature can do just about anything when she sets her mind to the task. Especially if she gets her dander up. However, when a purported human being deliberately sets a fire with the intent and purpose of enjoyment or whatever he thinks he gets out of it ... well, things have gone too far.

In the last month to six weeks our area has suffered from no less than three, count 'em (one ... two ... three) three arson caused fires. We were lucky. The first two fires were extinguished quickly. The third one was a different story. It burned a little over 500 acres and a structure or two before it was brought under control. There were two injuries to our volunteer firemen as well. Neither of them critical, let alone fatal, thankfully.

That particular fire was approximately 3/4's of a mile from us and we were sweating it. Big time. Oh, the structure(s) that burned belonged to our nearest neighbor.

We, along with all the farmers, ranchers and dairymen in the area, are grateful beyond belief for those volunteer firemen and we know, all too well, there is not enough we can do for them.

However, I shall say it again: Thank you!

Arsonists

While there is not a whole lot we can do for the firemen — there is something we can do about the worthless scumbag or scumbags who started those fires. The bastard, bastards, bitch or bitches (see ... I believe in equal opportunity) had better hope and pray they get caught by the long arm of the law. Because if one of us catches them — well let me just say that there shall be a barbecue in their honor. As the old saying goes:

"Give a man a match and he'll be warm for a minute or two. Set him on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life."

I have yet to meet a person living in a fire danger area who:

a frigging arsonist. They just don't exist. The opinion in this area runs from:

Personally I prefer the second and third solutions. However, the Eighth Amendment does get in the way so it would appear it is the "Get a rope" solution. In the final analysis, all three are fatal to the arsonist. And that does not bother my conscience in the least.

Epilogue

The fire season has started and it looks like it maybe a long one. Hopefully the summer thunderstorms will take care of everything and the grass will be a lush green. I am not going to hold my breath but I will cross everything but my eyes.

I'll admit the chances of catching this rabid scum are not very good. In fact the odds stink. Without doubt there is a small chance and we might just get lucky, especially if the dirty rotter screws up. While I do not believe so much in luck — I firmly believe that people screw up from time to time.

Will we be lucky? Who knows. Besides I would rather be smart than lucky, and sooner or later the arsonist's luck will run out.

I just wonder if the good Doctor Hannibal Lector, would care to join us for roast leg of arsonist?

Dinner at eight.

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